The Power of Breath, Touch & Labeling Feelings
By Roma Khetarpal,
Board of Directors Member
Tools of Growth
~ Mindfulness is paying attention to the present moment with openness, curiosity, and a willingness to be with what is. ~
Given all the unknowns that we’ve experienced in the past 18 months, we certainly have had practice with mindfulness, consciously or unconsciously. This pandemic has taught us to be open to constant change. But all this pivoting into the unknown has not been without obstacles.
All of us—especially parents, children, school staff, and administrators—continue to work around the challenges while harboring the desire for things to return to “normal,” as they used to be. And whether we acknowledge it or not, we are still a long way away from normal. Now there’s a new contagion—the mental health pandemic. These mental health issues are a direct result of our not knowing how to self-regulate, how to manage our inner world. They are spreading like wildfire and showing up in younger and younger kids.
Children are generally ready to leave full-time online learning and excited to go back to school and be with their peers in person, but some are experiencing deep discontent with masks and social distancing. “I need to see my teacher’s lips move so I can fully understand what she’s saying,” one elementary student told me. “I’m so frustrated with the academic pressure of trying to catch up on all that we’ve missed. Our teachers are stressed out, and that stresses us out,” said a high schooler.
And here’s another comment that I got from my recent interview with a high school student before an online mindful parenting presentation through the District Wellness Department at William S. Hart Union High School District: “More than ever before, I see my peers doing drugs and vaping. I know this is their escape. So please check in on your kids. Stay close to your kids because they are self-harming more than ever before.”
Parents, teachers, school staff, and administrators all echo this angst, and their daily challenges make mindfulness crucial. Mindfulness is not a new-age practice of spirituality, nor is it connected to a religious belief, as some may argue. Mindfulness is a research-based response to the stress and anxiety that human beings experience when things are unknown for extended periods of time.
Here are some self-regulating and well-being practices that can help you practice mindfulness for yourself when you are feeling stress or anxiety:
The Power of Breath. Notice your heart rate or tightness in your body. Close your eyes or simply soften your gaze and take three breaths. Now notice your heart rate and the sensations in your body again. Repeat this cycle three-time—notice, breathe, notice.
The Power of Touch. Notice your heart rate or any uncomfortable sensations you might be feeling in your body. Close your eyes or simply soften your gaze and place your dominant hand on your heart for 30 seconds and feel your chest expanding and contracting. Notice your heart rate and body sensations again. Repeat this cycle three times—notice, hand on heart, notice.
The Power of Labeling Feelings. Notice your heart rate and any tightness in your body. Now really pay attention to what you might be feeling and label the feeling (sadness, anger, frustration, and so on). Be okay with whatever you’re feeling, without judgment or resistance. Allow this feeling to work through your body. Labeling feelings helps us create distance from them. Know those feelings come and go, and this too will pass.
Managing our perspective and mindset should be almost a daily practice for us now. Lean into the following three Ps to increase your mindfulness perspective when you or your children feel overwhelmed.
It’s not PERFECT; It’s not PERMANENT; it’s not PERSONAL.
Assuredly, the responses to this pandemic are not perfect. But they might change tomorrow. And certainly, this situation is not permanent. It will pass when it is supposed to pass. It definitely isn’t personal. We are all going through this in our own way—individually and collectively. We truly are all in this together.
While we have no control over what tomorrow will bring or when this pandemic will truly be behind us, we do have control over how we respond to it in our daily lives. If we can respond with openness and willingness to be with what is—in other words, with mindfulness, we will be equipped to carry our children through this. As parents, teachers, school staff, and administrators, this is the most important job we can do for the mental health of our children.
SCV Education Foundation is always here to support you. Please reach out to us if we can be of service in any way.